COVID CORNER

Tension of Opposites.

Selfishness. Selflessness. Living through these chaotic times, I’m finding these two concepts are changing me. I know that when, and if we get to the other side of this, many of us will be changed, but how exactly? It’s a curious thing.

Since I work in a hospital, the stress that already exists in the environment has been ratcheted up for the long term. How to find a place of normalcy when the job that was once without life or death risks, becomes a job with dire consequences.

I have seen how the chaos and stress has brought out a selfishness in people that can be mindboggling. A superior justifies shoving an underling into a situation where the virus is prevalent, but the safety measures are not. I did not sign up for that danger when I entered the healthcare system. That kind of thing is the military. When someone sits in their home eating Cocoa Puffs for lunch and says that “This is what you signed up for,” I am blown away. How thoughtless, how wrong. Yes, I signed up to care for sick people, but I didn’t sign up for a pandemic that has been complete chaos. And don’t even get me started on the mask wearing in public situation. You refuse? My God.

And then there are those that have helped. They check in to give me encouragement to get through the chaos. They make sure I have received masks. They have given to food banks to help feed those that have lost their incomes, they do little things such as deliver some flowers for the healthcare workers, or cookies, or just a sign of encouragement. They give a heartfelt thank you card, or bang the pots and pans in the evening shift change. They have given up in-person time with parents, children, and grandchildren to keep everyone safe. It’s the reason we are human: we want everyone to continue living.

I know of which I want to be, and I know that both exist in all of us to a degree. And for me it will be how these two behaviors weave into me to create someone different.